Sunday, August 1, 2010

Praise or despair? You choose...

April 2010 is a month I will never forget. My life was given back to me. My life was changed forever. I experienced a lot of pain, anxiety and thoughts of “What if?” But I also experienced a lot of praise, comfort and love. My family, my friends and the family of God were all a part of what happened this month. I really felt the prayers and the love they gave me. I could not have made it through as strong without them. So many people chose to participate by following my dad’s blog and by praying and so many of those people’s own lives were changed. Like a friend told me, “There were a lot of heart transplants happening that month”. Mine was physical, but there were many spiritual hearts being rejuvenated and cleansed. I am so thankful for that. I love still hearing about how other people were changed because God was working in them while He was working in me.

A hospital ICU room seems like it would be a place of doubt and despair, however it can also be a place of praise and worship. When I went into the hospital on April 1st I was wheeled to the very familiar 8th floor for heart patients. They soon realized I was too sick to be on this floor and admitted me into the CCU (Cardiac Care Unit). As you all know I was very sick that day and digressing quickly. By the time I made it up to the room I fell asleep, and was unaware of the commotion going on around me. I don’t remember the rest of that evening, and even being moved to the CCU. However, God made me alert in just the perfect time. He wanted this room to be full of praise not despair. Dad was getting ready to leave for the evening, but before he did mom and him gathered around my bed to pray. We all held hands and as he was finishing praying I heard my Aunt Sharon walk in. I reached out for her to come join us in prayer and that was when the night changed into a night I will never forget. Dad left and mom and Aunt Sharon were going to stay in my room all night. From that point we started singing songs of praise, sharing our favorite verses and what they meant to us. I was so sick all day and didn’t even realize when a couple of my friends came to visit. I slept through the nurses taking vitals and the doctors analyzing the situation, but for some reason He made me well enough Thursday night and into early Friday morning to sing praises to Him. He knew I needed this. He knew what was lying ahead. He knew the very next day my life would be on the line.

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